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February 29, 2008 |
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Previous Posts |
The Evolvement of Elena (or more than you ever cared to know about Elena's political beliefs)
When I think back to 8th grade, I think of a lot of innocence and happiness. I was naive. I had (and I still have) wonderful friends with secret codes. I excelled at school. I was active (if you can believe this one) in athletics. I volunteered like mad around the school and in the community. At home, things weren't always the greatest, but I never really let it get me down. I just sort of persevered. I surrounded myself with positive people and positive role models and I always tried to remain true to myself.
I do believe that junior high can be a very trying time for kids. Some kids start to experiment with alcohol and illegal substances. Kids are beginning to date and want to explore their sexuality. It is a time when students are doing their very best to forge an identity for themselves. It is a time when you are creating a social niche that will more than likely follow you through high school.
Up to that point, there were certain things in my life that I either didn't understand or didn't question enough to understand. There were some things that I just took for granted and accepted. There were other things that I inherently knew were not okay and just learned to figure out on my own. As time passed and I matured, my opinions evolved. My identity changed. My ability to understand, question, acknowledge, and debate issues strengthened.
Allow me to be a bit more specific.
Example #1: As many of you know, I am of Mexican descent. Well, my paternal half is anyway. The other half is comprised of some German and Norwegian. In any case, my Mexican heritage places me in a minority group. I grew up listening to many of the Mexican people in my family calling African Americans that horrible "n" word and Asian Americans being called that horrible "ch" word. Nobody had to tell me this was not okay. I knew and never accepted the use of such language. I never used the language and I cringed whenever I had to hear it. It always baffled me that one oppressed group found it okay to oppress another.
In elementary school, I was good friends with a Cambodian girl and a Vietnamese girl. It never really occurred to me that they were any different than me. There was really only one African American girl in my class (until I got a bit older) and I would consider her a friend, but she wasn't in the group I played with at recess. Still, I never really thought of her as any different from me. She was just another girl in my class. Diversity has always been something that I have inherently accepted, believed in, and cherished.
Example #2: I recall writing an opinion paper where I had to identify if I was pro-choice, pro-life, or neither. I had to interview people and attach their opinions to the paper as well. I found that paper not too long ago. I was very surprised to find that as a young student, I was VERY pro-life. Almost to an extreme, I would say. I am almost positive that I gained this opinion from growing up in in a Christian home.
As time evolved and I ventured off to college, I would say that I fell much more on the side of pro-choice. I really believed that women should have the right to choose whether or not they wanted to terminate a pregnancy. I did not do much research on the issue and just sort-of fell into believing what my political party believed. At the same time, I watched as women who could not handle their own lives were bringing children into the world who would be pretty much set up to fail. It would eventually become a vicious cycle of poverty, lack of morals, and the like. Thus making me believe that being pro-choice was the answer.
I argued over the abortion issue many times. I stated my belief openly. Some agreed with me. Some disagreed with me. One of the more startling revelations was a time when I was dating someone, and I was distressed about feeling like being pro-life was being thrust at me at a place where I didn't welcome it. My boyfriend didn't argue with me. I did not (and really still do not) know his take on the issue (though I have my suspicions). Instead of engaging me in conversation over it, he said "let's not talk politics anymore, okay?" (At that point, I should have walked away...) When I started dating Joel, we also had many conversations about it and I really believed that I was pro-choice, but I couldn't figure out why I was so bothered by having to argue it. I was convinced that for me, abortion would never be okay, but I was not to judge or decide what s right for others.
Over time and many more discussions with different people, I realized that the real reason that I was so bothered and had such a hard time committing to being pro-choice was that I wasn't. I was never really there. I never believed it was okay to terminate the life. While I felt distress and sympathy for both the mother and child, I never believed that it was okay to use abortion as a method of birth control. When I look at unwanted pregnancies (especially in teenagers and single mothers), I think that there are so many different responsible methods for preventing pregnancy. There is so much education and so many resources out there and when it gets to a point where you are pregnant and wanting to terminate it-- people need to take responsibility.
I heartily stand behind my beliefs, but I would never push somebody away for doing something I don't believe in. My job is to love. I will always do my best to love and support as best as I can. That is my job.
All that is to say that as an 8th grader, I thought I knew about life and morals, but in reality it would take me years and years to determine what I really believed and to be firm in such beliefs. Thus, I am completely baffled, distraught, angry, sad, and in disbelief over what happened in Oxnard, CA just before Valentine's Day.
One 8th grade boy told asked another 8th grade boy to be his Valentine. This resulted in the boy killing the other because he was gay. How horrible is it that as one student tries to be himself, another student takes it away from him? How sad is it that messages of hatred continue to be sent to our young children?
It needs to stop. No matter your beliefs, the message of love and acceptance needs to be sent. Children need to know that they are loved unconditionally. Children need to know that violence is never the answer. Children need to be taught to love.
My job is to love, not to judge.
My greatest hope is that my children always embrace this message and feel it in everything they say and do.
(If you're interested, ellen talked about this on her show and here is the clip.) |
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